Player Profile for Tarquim Clark
4 May 1981
TQ, Mohammed, Stavros, Toks
Handicap Index (August 2019)
Favourite Course played on SOS
Favourite Course played Anywhere
St Francis Links
Bucket List Golf Course (yet to play)
Taylormade OS Daytona CB
Callaway chrome soft
Favourite Club in the bag
Strength in your game
I don’t take it too seriously
Weakness in your game
What you love about Golf
Finding new ways to improve, and seeing what golf then does to ensure you still don’t break 80.
What you love about SOS *
My mates… getting very very drunk and chirping the hell out of each other.
What the Tour said about him (2019):
Worst Caddie ever
Made a hole in one. So suck a dick.
The TQ Golf Shot: fat, fucked, high and right
Makes holes in roofs in the week, then fixes them on the weekend
Help achieve a level 1 BEE for SOS
Best caddie on tour
Not even queer eye for a straight guy can save this guy
is the only member of SOS to feel threatened by the recent Xenophobic attack’s
I wish he’d stop bringing his chick to fines… Either she must play SOS, or he must tell her to stay at home.
What is he? Is he Pakistani? Is he Afghan? Is he Zulu? Is he Arab? Why’s he so fat?
His family tree consists of 6 coffee’s and 1 milk.
yes i keep getting reminded that eed is soon
Probably thinks that Allahu Akbar is a snack cos he is always saying it
The Michael Jackson of SOS! #intransition
do you know how far he had to swim to make it all the way to PE, from Syria
What the Tour said about him (2015):
“Best fun playing a round with Tarqueen, once those drives straighten out we’re all in a bit of trouble!”
“What a biscuit. First round pick if I was choosing friends. Fails to be drafted if I’m choosing fourball company. SERIOUSLY. TQ, to his mates, is THE Tour Funny Man. Watch yourself and your wallet around this bloke, he’ll stop at nothing until he has your money and your pride.”
“Cool name – for a hippie!”
“ Super slicer, super smoker, never seen him without a fag in his mouth or near his ass”
“Tarquin’s golf motto. Swing hard in case you hit it!”
“Never seen him drive a ball without a fag in his mouth, and a really fun guy to have in your four ball.”
“Always having a smoke while driving, putting, iron shots, in the bushes. Everywhere.”
“Looks like a pedophile…… But isn’t……. Or is he?”
“ F#cken funny bastard!”
“He seems to only be in the SOS Tour to drink the beer. My only competitor at this stage. And an interesting fact, my autocorrect changed his name to Tarquinius! He is a man I can see myself getting helluva drunk with in the future”
“Considerate, plays with a yellow ball so his fellow tour members can see the ball coming for them”