Behind The Scenes: S.O.S. Golf Tour
“Where straight is great but far is car?”
Many people often ask me what it’s like being on the SOS golf tour and how it compares with other more well-known tours like the US PGA Tour or the European Tour. Quite frankly it is incredibly similar. All the guys out here on the SOS tour work very hard during the week in the hope it will pay off over the weekend. We look carefully at our year and work our schedules around the big events in the season just as the other pros do. The majors and the lucrative season ending playoffs are a must if you are thinking about vying for honours come the end of the season, or at the very least keeping your playing privileges.
Where we differ is undoubtedly the bond between the players on tour. Every member of the SOS tour is friendly with each other and the comradeship on tour is hard to find on other tours. That’s not to say there aren’t disagreements and bickering. That happens on an almost daily basis, often with hilarious results. Any time you have a large mix of personalities you are going to have differing opinions. We just try and keep those under wraps as much as possible when performing in front of the general public. Off the golf course however is a completely different story. Without giving too much away I would like to run you through some of the interesting characters we have on tour and how they relate to each other.
As you might well imagine there is a certain unspoken hierarchy amongst the players. Each season brings with it new talent and varying performances from existing tour members. The very nature of the game means that anyone can win on their day. There are however one or two guys who consistently rank up there and are contenders year in, year out for the number one spot. Two in particular have separated themselves from the pack:
‘J-Bomber’ on the course; ‘J-Bomber’ off the course
Damian ‘Shooter McMurphy’ and Bernard ‘J-Bomber’ are undoubtedly the two pros who top the elite list of SOS Tour professionals each season. Highly competitive on the course these two are tough to beat. Off the course both are good guys though and enjoy the odd 19th hole.
If we are talking about the most talented golfer on tour though, one name will come up often. Denzil ‘Mercedes Denz’ is undoubtedly the premier pro on tour. Similar to Louis Oosthuizen in that his off course activities seem to take priority over his tour job. With a bit more application on the SOS tour, this smooth swinger would be a shoe in for the number one ranking.
‘Mercedes Denz’ the ‘Louis’ of tour
There are some angry men on the tour too. Guys have been known to wrap their clubs around the odd tree or throw them further than they just hit the ball. The angriest would undoubtedly be Greg ‘Spunce’. The man has a future as a human coffee machine with the amount of steam jetting from his ears. No one has ever had as many bad breaks on the links as this guy. From holes that clearly aren’t regulation size to putts that plain refuse to drop – the hits just keep on coming!
“Why did yours go in and mine missed?” – Greg ‘Spunce’
Biggest smack talker? That would undoubtedly be the ‘Dawg’. Not afraid of asking questions on fellow golfer’s backswings this man relies heavily on his below the belt banter to give him an edge. The star on his shirt sleeve though speaks to his mastery of the dark arts.
The ‘Dwag’ with ‘Gorgeous’ George
Without a doubt, the year-end tour is the highlight of the SOS season. The chance to rocket up the rankings with the points heavily loaded and the promise of phenomenal locations appeal to all. Touring also presents the rare opportunity for a good-natured prank or two. Players have woken up covered in a variety of spices, tour shirts have been ‘lost’ only to be found moments before tee time frozen solid in the fridge freezer and interesting tour attire makes an appearance. A few years back a courtesy car I was travelling in had a very impressive appendage drawn on the door in Vaseline. Invisible at first, the dust from the dirt roads unveiled the fantastic phallus in all its glory. We received loads of strange looks from parents and kids alike passing us on the highway home.
Marcel’s on course attire accurately reflects his personality…
Prickaso strikes again…
It’s not just the golf that we look forward to though, its spending time with your mates, dinners, impromptu fines meetings and tour songs all contribute to making the year end tour a special occasion. With a little over a month to go, I’m sure I speak for everyone when I say it can’t come soon enough.
“See you on tour.” – Pezula 2017